I want a sandwich How many legitimately good Italian restaurants are there in NoVA? I hope Graham gets better 27 days :) 28 days :)) :)) this emoticon looks like a double chin I should be asleep right now Harry Potter... ...Glee... Where are my headphones? ...Yo Gabba Gabba! :) I wish there was a party in my tummy (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Os-CACRwM8) I miss watching TV with Ava I miss these people I want my snuggie :P I really should be asleep But I think I'm going to make a cup of coffee :S
a couple of the things I thought about today that i miss:
i miss my family i miss my ESV study Bible (i left it on a bus) i miss my grandma i miss my ukulele i miss free laundry i miss good ol' homecookin' i miss AMERICAN holidays :) (sorry Canada) i miss my car i miss my longboard
last but most certainly not least...i miss this face hahaha :)
I love to sing. No matter how many people's ears go deaf because of my horrible tone, I'll still do it. Most (if not all) of the songs I sing are about love. From other people or from God. I've never fought a spiritual battle unlike the one I've been fighting over the past couple months. To whomever that reads this, I ask that you pray that Satan won't get a hold of my life, especially since I am back at school. My love for singing hasn't changed, but my heart doesn't feel the same anymore.
I heard this song tonight from one of my favorite artists, Jimmy Needham. Here's the chorus of the titled song, "The Reason I Sing."
Cause even accolades someday will fade away Oh just like me Yes everything but You, yeah And many years from now it won't matter How I write the rhymes I do, yeah Help me get back to the reason I sing for You
Lord, help me get back to the reason I sing for You.
"We should mold and shape our lives according to scripture and NOT shove scripture into the lives we want to live." - Todd Phillips [Frontline Sermon - Biblical Manhood and Womanhood - Part 2 - 7.18.10]
I had the opportunity of serving the Lord at a Junior High Camp held by the youth group at my church. Over 300 students and leaders were there to spend time in the word, in worship, and fellowship with one another. It was an amazing time and I cherished every minute of the four days that we were at NorthBay Camp.
On the last night of programs, one of the teaching pastors told us about an analogy using a chicken drumstick. He compared an uneaten drumstick to our life that should be used as an offering to God, uneaten and untouched. As we was taking bites out of the chicken, he was saying how that is what we offer up to God in regards to our life. It's not pleasant to the eye, and no one wants a half-eaten piece of chicken or even just the bone for that matter.
When you bring blind animals for sacrifice, is that not wrong? When you sacrifice crippled or diseased animals, is that not wrong? Try offering them to your governor! Would he be pleased with you? Would he accept you?" says the LORD Almighty. [Malachi 1:8]
God wants all of us or nothing at all. Coming into camp, I was holding onto something that was dear to me. Something that I kept inside myself and only a few others knew about. I held onto it hoping that it would someday happen, but that wasn't healthy in my relationship with Christ. It was getting in the way many, many times and I didn't want to give it up. I was stubborn and I was taking the wheel, not Jesus (ala Carrie Underwood's song and another Mike Reed analogy). I finally found enough strength to let go and let God.
And once more. My verse for the summer:
What is more, I consider EVERYTHING a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ. [Philippians 3:8]
What are you holding onto that is keeping you from surrendering fully to the Lord?
Father i come to You with a heavy heart. i have lots on my mind weighing down on me but i thank You for giving me peace in Your precious Son Christ Jesus. i worry. i overthink. i cry. over material, worldly, and stupid things. but Your word and Your promises keep me going throughout the day. i walk by faith, and not by sight knowing that You are with me always to the ends of the earth. day or night Your light shines ever so brightly. my dependence on You grows each passing day. relationships, academics, my life, and my heart i lay it at Your feet. i am Yours let Your will be done. love.
While reading my daily chapter of Proverbs, I came across this verse that came from the Almighty Father this Father's Day morning.
Stop listening to instruction, my son, and you will stray from the words of knowledge. [Proverbs 19:26]
I feel like God is not only scolding me, but also encouraging me at the same time to get back on track and get into the word daily because I haven't been using my time wisely these last couple of days.
Awesome.
love. ------- side notes: yes it is 4:45am and i have to be at church at 7:45am. i'm tired, but not sleepy this fly keeps jumping/flying back onto my arm no matter how many times i flick it happy father's day to all you dads out there don't forget our heavenly Father as well :)
Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. [Ephesians 4:32]
I read this list online about forgiveness (http://blog.harvestbiblefellowship.org/?p=4257): 1. I won’t bring the offense up to the person, except for his benefit; 2. I won’t bring the offense up to others; and (hardest of all) 3. I won’t bring the offense up to myself. I will not go over it and think about it and dwell upon it.
When we sin, God forgives us regardless of what we've done. Christ's death on the cross was THE ultimate sacrifice for sins of the past, present, and future.
Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. [Psalm 139:23-24]
"Our fear is of the Lord Himself and not His laws. Once we step away from the fear of Him, then the Laws become important because of tradition. The Pharisees and Sadducees had this very problem. They got around 'breaking' the Law by careful arguments and procedures. However, if we obey because He is the keeper of the Laws, then we need to be much more careful. He knows when our hearts are not cheerfully doing His laws and cutting corners. Fearing the LORD Himself holds us personally accountable."
So Moses and Aaron said to all the Israelites, "In the evening you will know that it was the LORD who brought you out of Egypt, and in the morning you will see the glory of the LORD, because he has heard your grumbling against him. Who are we, that you should grumble against us?" Moses also said, "You will know that it was the LORD when he gives you meat to eat in the evening and all the bread you want in the morning, because he has heard your grumbling against him. Who are we? You are not grumbling against us, but against the LORD." [Exodus 16:6-8]
"My complaining may focus on another person. That may be where my eyes are, but my real complaint is not with people. My complaint is with God and He hears it...When you and I receive painful consequences for our behavior and attitudes, we need to remember that this is not retaliation by God; He "retaliates" with faithfulness and blessings." -James MacDonald [Our Journey, 6/1/10]
Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. [1 Peter 5:7]
An excerpt from the ESV Study Bible: Worry is a form of pride because it involves taking concerns upon oneself instead of entrusting them to God. Believers can trust God because, as their Father, he cares for them.
This is what I needed to read today. Good thing I found my study Bible on the bookshelf in the guest room. Thank you Lord for showing this to me tonight.
From the ends of the earth I will cry to You, When my heart is overwhelmed; Lead me to the rock that is higher than I. [Psalm 61:2 NKJV]
Father, with all that's going on right now, I am feeling very overwhelmed and helpless at times. I have no idea how to go about some of these things. My heart cries out to You, Lord. I don't want my problems to overwhelm me. I want You to. Take my heart and break the walls that I have put up surrounding it. I know that You are bigger than any problems that I will ever have on this earth. Rid my mind of the negativity and the pessimism and fill it with thoughts of You. I should stop dwelling on my problems and dwell in You instead. You are my rock and my strength. You will not be moved. I am forever in Your hands. I love You God.
-Ant
----- Overwhelm - Starfield
This is an invitation to overwhelm my heart I'm asking you to meet me I'm waiting here to start My soul is like a desert Thirsty for your rain So open up the heavens And fill me up again I'm ready for my life to be consumed
Father here I am Overwhelm, Overwhelm Only your love can Overwhelm, Overwhelm Let your spirit fall Overtaking all Overwhelm, overwhelm, overwhelm, overwhelm me
Desperate for your presence I long for you alone So Dwell within me Jesus This temple is your home I'm ready for this life to be consumed
Father here I am Overwhelm, Overwhelm Only your love can Overwhelm, Overwhelm Let your spirit fall Overtaking all Overwhelm, overwhelm, overwhelm, overwhelm, Overwhelm, overwhelm, overwhelm, overwhelm me
Father here I am Overwhelm, Overwhelm Only your love can Overwhelm
Father here I am Overwhelm, Overwhelm Only your love can Overwhelm, Overwhelm Let your spirit fall Overtake it all Let your spirit fall Overtake it all Overwhelm, overwhelm, overwhelm, overwhelm, Overwhelm, overwhelm, overwhelm, overwhelm me
Found this quote on a blog by a new band that I recently (30 minutes ago) found out about. They are called Sixteen Cities. I'm liking their music so far, and as I was looking on their myspace, I came across one of their blogs here's an excerpt on something that I'm going through right now:
"You know, if there’s something in your life that you just love doing, and you’re super passionate about it…. Do it! God gave you that love and passion for a reason. Even if you think 'Well I love to do ______, but there are plenty of other people who can do it way better than me…' just go for it. God will open and close the right doors to get you where you need to be, you just need to trust Him."
From early morning until late at night, it was a really, really rough day. Ranging from headaches to academics, it wasn't a very good. But throughout everything that came my way, I couldn't help but remember what the Scriptures tell us when events or speed bumps slow us down. When it comes to planning our own lives, we should just leave it up to God.
God derails our plans sometimes. That's just the way He works.
When it happens, we are called not to lose heart. Not sit and sulk and be mad about it. We just have to move forward and put all of our trust in God and His perfect plan. Because He is our loving Father, He works out things for what He wants for us, even when we don't expect/want Him to. His timing after all is better than our own.
1 To man belong the plans of the heart, but from the LORD comes the reply of the tongue. 2 All a man's ways seem innocent to him, but motives are weighed by the LORD. 3 Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and your plans will succeed. 4 The LORD works out everything for his own ends— even the wicked for a day of disaster. 5 The LORD detests all the proud of heart. Be sure of this: They will not go unpunished. 6 Through love and faithfulness sin is atoned for; through the fear of the LORD a man avoids evil. 7 When a man's ways are pleasing to the LORD, he makes even his enemies live at peace with him. 8 Better a little with righteousness than much gain with injustice. 9 In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps. [Proverbs 16:1-9]
14 WAIT for the LORD; be strong and take heart and WAIT for the LORD. [Psalm 27:14]
5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; 6 in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. [Proverbs 3:5-6]
Things don't happen the way we want them to for a reason. Whether it's with academics, relationships, careers, etc. God has a plan for each and every one of us and we shouldn't worry about what is or isn't going to happen tomorrow. We don't know what'll happen. We just have to take it one day at a time and wake up each and every day putting full trust in the Lord.
25"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? 26Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? 28"And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 30If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? 31So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' 32For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. [Matthew 6:25-34]
I firmly believe that God has a plan for me. Better than the one that I can come up with myself.
11For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. [Jeremiah 29:11]
Things happened today that will change many things within the coming months. It's been a very, very long day and an even longer semester. I have an exam in the morning and I am homebound shortly thereafter. Farewell YorkU
-Ant
2Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. 4Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. [James 1:2-4]
5 Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from him. 6 He alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will not be shaken. 7 My salvation and my honor depend on God; he is my mighty rock, my refuge. 8 Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge. Selah [Psalm 62:5-8]
There's such a feeling of freedom in being a child of God. I'm not held down to be anyone or do anything. He's all I need.
I'm free to be me.
------ At twenty years of age I'm still looking for a dream A war's already waged for my destiny But You've already won the battle And You've got great plans for me Though I can’t always see
‘Cause I got a couple dents in my fender Got a couple rips in my jeans Try to fit the pieces together But perfection is my enemy On my own I'm so clumsy But on Your shoulders I can see I'm free to be me
When I was just a girl I thought I had it figured out My life would turn out right, and I'd make it here somehow But things don't always come that easy And sometimes I would doubt
And you’re free to be you
Sometimes I believe that I can do anything Yet other times I think I've got nothing good to bring But You look at my heart and You tell me That I've got all You seek And it’s easy to believe Even though
Jesus conquered death and was risen on this day. Easter is more than the Easter bunny. It is more than pastel-colored, plastic eggs filled with candy and money (in my house). More than Peeps (I love those hah). Easter is about the resurrection of Jesus after he was nailed on the cross and shed his blood for our sins. Because of this, I am forgiven. Because of his suffering, I have confidence that I will dwell with my Father in heaven when my life on earth is up. He shed his blood for us because HE LOVES US.
I live a life unworthy of God's love. I'm so undeserving because of all I've done in my life. But regardless, Jesus wiped that all away when he died for me (and all of you) and now I am forgiven.
"Don't interpret God in light of your circumstances. Interpret your circumstances in light of God." -Mike Kelsey ("How To See In The Dark" Frontline sermon - 3/7/10)
And I'm still a dreamer, a believer Oh I've lost my faith in so many things, But I still believe in You Cause You are the Answer, the Redeemer Oh I've given up on too many things, But I'm not giving up on You Cause You can make anything new. .... I don't have every answer in life But I'm trusting You One day at a time Cause You can make a weak heart stay alive forever This is where heaven and earth collide I lift my hands and give my life This is how my weary heart stays alive
:)
I'm streaming Sanctus Real's new CD online and it's so far so good. I'm relating to many of the songs very much, especially this one.
"I heard it said once that the best thing that could ever happen to any of us is if all of our sins were broadcast on the five o’clock news. And yeah, that can be a fairly disturbing thought, I suppose, but think about it for a moment. Think of how scary that is, and yet somehow, so incredibly freeing, too. If everyone knew all your junk, all your fears, all your questions, you wouldn’t have to hide anymore. No more masks. No more pretending. Just you, and hopefully, the grace that comes when we step into the light. Sure, it can be the most terrifying step you’ll ever have to take, but when we do, when we lay our souls out naked and bare for all to see, it forces us out of the shadows and into a place where life begins. It’s where the light meets the dark, and it’s where we want to be. Hope to meet you there." - Mike Donehey (from Tenth Avenue North)
http://tenthavenuenorth.com/volumes/post/1053 ---- That's why accountability partners are so helpful. Even it's not to the same degree as your faults and sins being broadcasted on the news, it's still sucks to tell someone what and why you did it. It is freeing.
I want to be there too. Where the light meets the dark.
I'm sensing a new name change on the blog :)
Loving the new Tenth Avenue North song too! (it's on the link up top)
Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart. [Psalm 37:4]
From the ESV Study Bible: Ps 37:4 - the desires of your heart. Some take “the desires” as referring to the feeling of desire, i.e., “God will shape your heart so that it desires the right things”; but the sense is rather, “he will give you what your heart desires.” It is safe to say this to those who embrace the advice of this psalm, because as they delight themselves in the Lord, their hearts will desire the right things.
The Lord will give you what your heart desires, but He will also shape your heart to desire the right things. You must first seek the kingdom of God, and all these will be given to you as well [Matthew 6:33].
But you also have to keep in mind...
When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures. [James 4:3]
God doesn't give you certain things because you're asking for all of the wrong reasons. Like I said before, as you seek Him, He will change your heart according to what He wants for you even when it's different from what you want for yourself. God is our loving Father. He wants what is best for us.
Just take a couple of minutes and examine the things you ask of God and why it is that you want them.
So one of the pastors at my church (back home) posted a challenge on the church blog.
The goal of the challenge is to develop a passion for reading God's Word and studying it.
How you ask? Read Psalm 119 everyday for the next 119 days. I just started yesterday and I'm already feeling something stirring in my heart. Don't be discouraged by reading it too because Psalm 119 is the longest Psalm consisting of 176 verses.
I encourage you to take on the challenge if you want to develop a passion for studying the Bible.
How sweet are your words to my taste, sweeter than honey to my mouth! [Psalm 119:103]
So, with about 15 minutes left in Valentine's Day, I decided to post a song that has quickly grown on me since I heard it for the first time yesterday.
It indeed talks about love, but not gushy, romantic love. Rather love from our Father that was given to us from the form of His Son, Jesus Christ. After I got home a couple of hours ago from Senior High Winter camp at my church, I tried to find that song on Google and YouTube. To my luck, and searching skills I eventually found it. It is a song by NewWorldSon titled, 'There Is A Way.'
----
You say love is just a word, just four letters in a row. Just a thing that people say, or they never tell you so. And you use every excuse, to let nobody in. Now this cloud you bring around, has become your only friend.
And everybody saying that it's going to go away, but it don't go. And everybody's telling you one day it's going to change, but you don't know, if it's really going to end. But there is a way, there is a spark, there is a hope that you can hold on to. There is a lifeline come to the rescue, just like a hand that's waiting for you. And if you believe in this I promise that you won't be alone. There is a way, the truth and the life, and the way.
But if love became a man, if the word had flesh and bone. Would you recognize His face, if He came to bring you home. You think you're all alone, gotta do it on your own riding solo. Is there someone you can call, when you stumble and fall? Cause you don't know, if you'll be getting up again.
There is a way, there is a spark, there is a hope that you can hold on to. There is a lifeline come to the rescue, just like a hand that's waiting for you. And if you believe in this I promise that you won't be alone. There is a way, the truth and the life, and the way.
Don't you think your life's worth saving? Don't you know that love's amazing? Don't you want to lay your troubles down? Lay them down.
If I thought love was just a word, I might feel the same way too. But there's so much more than that, and it's waiting here for you.
There is a way, there is a spark, there is a hope that you can hold on to. There is a lifeline come to the rescue, just like a hand that's waiting for you. And if you believe in this I promise that you won't be alone. There is a way, there is a way... ----
Love this song!
I might cover it very soon...I hope I don't kill the song :(
Ya know, I've been feeling bitter and hard-hearted over something that I had no control over. I didn't know what to feel and I let the emotions get the best of me. I told people what had happened, and after, I just felt so guilty after I had thrown that person that had wronged me "under the bus."
After talking to my friends about it, they quickly stopped me and helped me come to my realization that I'm being apathetic and unforgiving over that person. I admit it. I was. And it was through fellowship with my fellow brothers-in-Christ that helped me come to my senses.
God tells us that we MUST be forgiving of everyone. No matter the circumstance. No matter how great. No matter how small. No matter how many times. No excuses.
Reminds me of the Parable of the Unmerciful Servant (Matthew 18:21-35):
Then Peter came up and said to him, "Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?" Jesus said to him, "I do not say to you seven times, but seventy times seven." Therefore the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who wished to settle accounts with his servants. When he began to settle, one was brought to him who owed him ten thousand talents. And since he could not pay, his master ordered him to be sold, with his wife and children and all that he had, and payment to be made. So the servant fell on his knees, imploring him, 'Have patience with me, and I will pay you everything.' And out of pity for him, the master of that servant released him and forgave him the debt. But when that same servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii, and seizing him, he began to choke him, saying, 'Pay what you owe.' So his fellow servant fell down and pleaded with him, 'Have patience with me, and I will pay you.' He refused and went and put him in prison until he should pay the debt. When his fellow servants saw what had taken place, they were greatly distressed, and they went and reported to their master all that had taken place. Then his master summoned him and said to him, 'You wicked servant! I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me. And should not you have had mercy on your fellow servant, as I had mercy on you?' And in anger his master delivered him to the jailers, until he should pay all his debt. So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother from your heart."
God forgives us of our sins, why can't we forgive our brothers an sisters who sin against us?
Seventy.Times.Seven.
(if you don't know or are mathematically challenged like me 70 x 7 = 490)
I love swedish fish (finnish fish here in Canada ay?). I'm chomping through a bag as I'm writing this. It's second right now on my list of loves. First and foremost being the Almighty God.
:)
Ant
P.S. - To the ladies who read this blog, that is one way to win my heart. HAHA just sayin'
So large event is over :(. No more promoting. I found great joy in promoting something great for God. Although I expected more people to show up, we still had a great number to hear two awesome stories by two awesome people.
But just because large event is over doesn't mean we're done for the year. There's still contact info sheets to sift through, follow-ups, MDA events, and weekend Leadership meetings. It's going to be a busy next couple of months, and with the school year winding down, it's gonna suck, period.
Hmmm...here's to a great event and a great rest of the school year. Praise God and let it roll...
The word hope means "a confident expectation of something better." Hope in Christ realizes, "Hey! My best days are ahead of me. Life isn't all in the rearview mirror for me now. In Christ I've got some things I'm looking forward to - not just in this life, but in the life to come." That kind of self-talk stirs up hope within us.
I got this in a devotional I received in an e-mail. So true.
So Monday night (January 25th), during my quiet time with God, I didn't know what to pray for. I was stuck at a standstill the words weren't there.
I told God, "Father, I honestly don't know what to pray for. I feel like my heart isn't in the right place right now and I want you to soften it and make it Yours. Let my heart, my ears, my eyes, and my mind be open to receiving Your Word and Your Spirit. Fill me."
I ended my prayer like that.
Then last night (Tuesday, January 26th) for my daily devotional, the title was "Prayer First Aid."
I was like WHAT!? WHOAAH!? That's legit.
The first couple words of the devotional were: If you've ever struggled to know what to pray for or how to pray, this list, based on Psalm 25:16-21 will help you focus on some of the most important aspects of prayer.
It outlined 6 points: Honesty, Petition, Confession, Circumstances, Faith, and Dedication. each of them referring to Psalm 25:16-21.
Turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted. The troubles of my heart have multiplied; free me from my anguish. Look upon my affliction and my distress and take away all my sins. See how my enemies have increased and how fiercely they hate me! Guard my life and rescue me; let me not be put to shame, for I take refuge in you. May integrity and uprightness protect me, because my hope is in you. [Psalm 25:16-21]
So I changed the name of my blog. It was In Between Dreams - named after my favorite Jack Johnson CD, but I changed it last night because of my new favorite CD. Over and Underneath by Tenth Avenue North.
All of the songs on this CD speak to me on a personal level. Everytime I listen to it, I'm reminded of God's promises and I am at peace.
A big thanks to Tenth Avenue North and their songwriting, but most of all God for His unconditional, unfailing love for you and I.
"Faith Quote of the Day: 'God does not ask about our ability, but our availability.' - Jeremy Manongdo aka Passion"
"Don't let fear dictate your decisions. It's a recipe 4 regret." - Mark Batterson
"Pray often! (A lot of kneeling will keep you in good standing)" - RevRunWisdom
"It's good to carry a Bible in your purse,briefcase or even your iPhone. But the best place to carry Gods word is in your heart!" - Greg Laurie
"You are who you are when nobody's watching" - RevRunWisdom
"Everything comes to him who hustles while he waits." - WGTS 91.9
"Any Dude can love 1000 girls,, but it takes a gentleman to love 1 woman 1000 ways" - RevRunWisdom
"'Humility is simply another way of saying, 'I defer to God's will.' - Sam Storms" - Sarah Myles
"'Hearing God's voice is less dependent on your abilities than on your affections. God is more concerned with your commitment' - Sam Storms" - Sarah Myles
"God's timing is never late. It's perfect." - Kaylee Groves
I haven't blogged in a while. Why? Here's a list of possible reasons why you don't see a post as often as you should:
laziness (that's at the top for a reason)
I have nothing exciting to write about (I always write stuff, but 97% of it doesn't get blogged)
I'm studying (HAHA that one's good! Actually I'm trying to study a lot more than I have been)
I'm reading (yes, I read...halfway through books and then pick up another one)
I'm playing the guitar (with songs with the same exact chord progressions)
I write songs (with words that only stay on paper. They only leave my mouth on special occasion, or it's really good...I highly doubt that)
I'm cleaning my room (literally everyday...I find a way to make a mess)
My trash bin ate my blog post (my dog ate my homework several times in high school...I never had a dog)
I'm sleeping (on average, I get 6 hours of sleep a day)
God has me doing something exciting (oh yeah!)
I'm talking to God (always!)
I'm DC chillin' (what?)
My computer got a virus (oh wait, MacBooks don't get viruses)
Oh there are many more reasons, but these are the only ones that are legitimately true :/. I will put a post up soon. Hopefully within this week. Maybe tomorrow. Maybe when I wake up? Nah...I'm probably going to be late for class again.
Good Monsters by Jars of Clay is an awesome CD. I highly suggest snagging it on iTunes.
Quote of the Day: "Never look back unless you are planning to go that way" - Henry David Thoreau
I first heard this song during worship at one of the Frontline services over the summer. I forgot about it and when I had downloaded Fee's CD last night, I didn't know that this song was on it (I didn't even know Fee sang the song). I didn't hear it until earlier today, and it was good timing because I was feeling a little crappy. A huge smile came on my face. As I was walking to school I was mouthing along with the lyrics and I even outstretched my arms in praise. God is faithful. He is with me everywhere I go. His promises will never be broken. He is awesome. I feel better having the reassurance of God's promises. Today I've have never been so excited to do something that I was afraid and shy of doing: sharing. I will continue on that tomorrow. :)
----
You were before time and You'll be when it ends for you have no beginning and no end Your word shall endure without change it is sure on Your promises we will stand secure
Faithful You are ever faithful You are ever faithful to us, God Powerful You are crowned all-powerful all the world will bow before You, Oh God
Your might, your display in the skies everyday everything You created for Your praise from the cross on the earth to Your throne you returned where You reign over all creation never changed, never shaken
You're the song of our soul salvation life that cannot be taken solid rock, firm foundation never changed, never shaken
Here I am sitting at the airport waiting for my flight. I see planes coming and going. I hear flights changing gate numbers.
Times change. Seasons change. Looks change. Clothes (should) change. Wants and desires change. Attitudes change. Many others things change, but that would take more time listing and it would be redundant.
It's only been 5 days into 2010 and I feel like a lot has changed. Things between a former flame and I are done. I'll leave it at that. But God steps in for a reason. He shakes up things in your life to see if your faith is strong and to see if you keep focus on Him in the tough times. Yeah, it sucks, but ultimately God knows best. It's time to really let go now.
I've started reading My Utmost For His Highest and it's funny how ever since I started reading it, it mentions waiting. It's something I must do. God is now in control and I think it's time for Him to be the author of the rest of my life. I'm going to stop wrestling over the pen and hand it over to Him.
Usually, something like this would have me bawling my eyes out and put me in a depressed and catatonic (at times) state. Not this time. I've changed. God has given me strength to get through things emotionally and He has assured me multiple times that He alone is in control and for me to let go and trust Him. I like this feeling. It's gonna take a lot to get me out of this state because I have God on my side. It's virtually impossible actually. I'm good. I just have to let Him keep changing me. Change is very good. I'm content.
Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. [Philippians 4:11]
So I found the book My Utmost for His Highest by Oswald Chambers. It belonged to my sister and she let me borrow it.
I've been reading it every day since the January 1 and every time, it has something convicting to say.
Here's the devotional from (today) January 4:
"Why Can't I Follow You Now?"
Peter said to him, "Lord, why can I not follow You now?" [John 13:37]
There are times when you can't understand why you cannot do what you want to do. When God brings a time of waiting, and appears to be unresponsive, don't fill it with busyness, just wait. The time of waiting may come to teach you the meaning of sanctification - to be set apart from sin and made holy - or it may come after the process of sanctification has begun to teach you what service means. Never run before God gives you His direction. If you have the slightest doubt, then He is not guiding. Whenever there is doubt - wait.
At first you may see clearly what God's will is - the severance of a friendship, the breaking off of a business relationship, or something else you feel distinctly is God's will for you to do. But never act of the impulse of that feeling. If you do, you will cause difficult situations to arise which will take years to untangle. Wait for God's timing and He will do it without any heartache to disappointment. When it is a question of the providential will of God, wait for God to move.
Peter did not wait for God. He predicted in his own mind where the test would come, and it came where he did not expect it. "I will lay down my life for Your sake." Peter's statement was honest but ignorant. "Jesus answered him, '…the rooster shall not crow till you have denied me three times'" (13:38). This was as with a deeper knowledge of Peter than Peter had of himself. He could not follow Jesus because He did not know himself or his own capabilities well enough. Natural devotion may be enough to attract us to Jesus, to make us feel His irresistible charm, but it will never make us disciples. Natural devotion will deny Jesus, always falling short of what it means to truly follow Him.
- Taken from My Utmost For His Highest (January 4 entry) Written By Oswald Chambers, edited by James Reimann ------- I will be posting excerpts from My Utmost For His Highest sporadically and when they are very convicting to myself.
Waiting has been a call from God to myself and it's very fitting that this entry was for today. It's so hard to do, but it's worth it when it's said and done.
